A mother is the most important person on earth. She cannot claim the honor of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any Cathedral -- a dwelling for an immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby's body.
- Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we’re doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.
- Nicole Johnson, The Invisible Woman
My son received a really cool ant farm for Christmas this year – thanks Aunt M and Uncle D – and our entire family has been enjoying watching the progression that the ants have made through the gel over the past few weeks. When we first received this gift in the mail, I have to say that I was slightly terrified by the thought of 30 harvester ants somehow escaping and crawling all over my son’s room. Thankfully, I soon realized that there is no way for the ants to escape, and a gift that I would probably not have bought my son has quickly become a family favorite.
Other favorites included a children’s camera that connects via USB cable to the computer (beware the games, though!), the board game Parcheesi, a cash register, and of course, Legos.
Which gifts were your family’s winners this year? Any flops?
My husband and I deliberately jumped off the runaway train of technology about 7 years ago. Facebook: not my friend. Twitter: bull-tweet. And most of all, NO DEVICES. By devices, I mean Blackberries, iBrains, etc. One small handheld machine functions like an imaginary friend, a security blanket, and crack all rolled into one. Devices promise escape from social anxieties and awkward silences — whip it out as soon as the conversation is at a lull and breathe a sigh of relief as you massage its keys and retreat inward. Bored? Don’t worry, there is no need to reflect on your life or your eternity, just inhale the stimulation from your device now and everything will be OK.
I always feel a little deflated when I am in someone’s presence and the device hops out. I just couldn’t compete with it. Maybe there is important business to be transacted, or maybe that picture just had to be captured and emailed into space, but maybe not. Maybe we could have just been together for a while as we had planned to be.
And all this extra traffic and interconnectedness creates such clutter. In the last 6 months, I have officially reached my personal saturation point — my mind and my calendar and my heart are very, very full. My goal these days is to declutter my mind and my calendar, to reclaim some time and mental space, so that I can live this vocation of the heart more completely. Having the internet at one’s fingertips 24/7 can’t possibly facilitate that.
But, like all good consumers, my husband and I are grappling with our principles when presented with tantalizing upgrade options. Wireless companies are not in the business of preserving our way of life. AT&T’s regular cell phone upgrade options are actually a downgrade: in fact I think they are refurbished versions of a car phone I had 10 years ago. However, the sparkling iPhones and Blackberries are free with a $15/month data plan… they beckon… for just $15/month, you could deal with emails while your kids play at the playground… you could research family restaurants and deals en route from a Sunday family outing… you could send images of all these precious moments to the grandparents in real time, or even make grandparents virtually present with Skype…
But is it good to be so interconnected, so digital, so busy, and to live one step ahead of the present moment instead of in it? When my middle children are occupied at the playground, I COULD get a lot done… but I also can play with my baby uninterrupted, or if he’s napping and it hits me that all is quiet, I might even be able to pray there in the sunshine. And some spontaneity and some confusion, rather than knowing steps A-Z, make for some of the best family memories. And true friendships are those where the conversation can lull and each others’ presence is enough, without a go-to device. And do my children need to feel like they have to compete with a device for my attention? I could see myself becoming the fastest draw in the West. When they’re teenagers being lured by iEverything, I want them to remember that I sacrificed technology to be with them when they were little.
So, upgrade or not? AT&T is trying to force our hand.
This morning as I was drying my hair after a shower at the gym, a woman approached me saying something that I couldn’t hear because of the noise from the hairdryer. A bit confused, I turned off the hairdryer and said, “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” To which she replied, “What a pretty dress, you look so feminine.” My face lit up with a smile as I thanked her for her compliment, and we both went our own separate ways.
I started thinking about this nice woman’s comment, realizing that I don’t often wear dresses, or even skirts for that matter. Quite honestly, the only reasons that I wore a dress today were: 1) All of my pants are in the wash, and 2) It really is too warm for pants (the highs are in the low 80′s), but I just don’t feel right wearing shorts in November!
So, what do you think? Is it worth the effort to bring a bit of the feminine into your everyday appearance? If so, how do you do this – perhaps you wear skirts, or cute headbands, or make sure that you have a nice hairstyle? Or do all of these seem like unimportant details to you?
Ok, maybe I don’t want you to answer that question. I’m going to narrow it down a little, and simply ask why is it that every time I try to open one of these containers, it looks like this?
Don’t worry. I am usually able to purchase one of these with a twist top. I avoid the above style like the plague. And when I have no other options, I don’t panic. I wait for Mr. Red to come home and then ask VERY nicely if he will open the container for me.
It is one of those lazy, sweatpant kind of days around here. The fall weather is descending slowly upon our area, creating that lovely morning chill enough to send me skirting out of my pj’s directly into the next best thing–sweatpants! The baby awoke this morning 2 days-post-immunizations, lethargic and needing to cuddle. She went willingly to a morning nap at 9am. What was a sweatpanted-mother to do but crawl into my own bed and take a nap too?! God bless sweatpant days.
Our day will be less than ordinary around here–no practices or fancy outings, no lessons or homework–just the hum drum of home life. The boys will soon return from preschool, we’ll lunch and play, walk outside to fetch our oldest, and be back again for more afternoon play and adventures. On the menu tonight are turkey pesto panini sandwiches made with the homemade bread that currently bakes in our breadmaker. We’re topping it off with leftover beef stew from last night and I’m already imagining the family sitting around the dinner table, snuggly in sweatpants and enjoying every minute of our coziness.
After stories and jammies and snuggles, we’ll kiss our little ones off to dreamland in prep for a bustling weekend full of soccer and pumpkins and ninja costume-wearing at a friend’s party. It will be full and they will need to be fresh.
But for tonight, my husband and I will settle in, watch a movie, snuggle on the couch and drink in our evening. For it will be a sweatpant kind of night, the best kind to be celebrated.
Hi, everyone. Today we have a guest post from my husband, “Mr. Red”:
Monday marks the 14th anniversary of the death of Christian singer-songwriter Rich Mullins, who died in a car accident at the age of 41. In his honor, I’d like to share some thoughts on Rich’s music. I hope this post will motivate some of you to give Rich’s music a fresh listen, and share his music with your children. In my experience, kids love Rich’s music, and the lyrics can spark great conversations.
I know what many of you are thinking: “Rich Mullins? Seriously?!? Awesome God is so cheesy! Besides, I can’t stand contemporary Christian music.”
Yes, I know that, despite good intentions, most contemporary Christian music is simply unbearable. And yes, Rich is no Pavarotti with his singing voice. And yes, there’s definitely some hokey synthesizers and other special effects going on in some of Rich’s songs. But that’s no excuse for dismissing Rich’s entire body of work.
First, as far as contemporary Christian music goes, Rich is as good as it gets. Second, Bob Dylan, Neil Young, and Tom Petty aren’t exactly the Three Tenors either. And before you write Rich off for some cheesy synthesizers, remember that 5 of his 11 studio albums were released during the 1980s. Don’t fault the man for coming of age in such a musically troubled time! I made this mistake originally. But when I finally paused to really listen, I heard music that at its core was simply beautiful. And I haven’t stopped listening since.
Rich explores many different themes in his music. I’ll focus this brief post on one theme that finds its way into many of his songs – that of death and the yearning for heaven. There’s something compelling about a guy that can say “Thy Kingdom Come!” and really mean it.
You can hear this theme in one of his first big hits, If I Stand (video, lyrics), whose chorus ends with the plea:
If I weep let it be as a man who is longing for his home.
He continues this theme in the song Calling Out Your Name (video, lyrics), one of Rich’s best, where he talks about his hope that “this thirst will not last long”:
From the place where morning gathers
You can look sometimes forever ’til you see
What time may never know
What time may never know
How the Lord takes by its corners this old world
And shakes us forward and shakes us free
To run wild with the hope
To run wild with the hope
The hope that this thirst will not last long
That it will soon drown in the song not sung in vain
And I feel thunder in the sky
I see the sky about to rain
And I hear the prairies calling out Your name
There’s a lot of imagery here, and you’ll need to listen to the entire song to get a full appreciation. But you can sense from the thunder and the impending rain that, like the wise virgins, he is staying awake, anticipating the hour when his thirst will be quenched, while creation groans for the birth of a new world.And then there’s Land of My Sojourn (video, lyrics), a beautiful song from probably my favorite Rich Mullins album, A Liturgy, A Legacy, and a Ragamuffin Band. In this song he talks about the freedom that still eludes men in this land of sojourn.
And from his last studio album, Brother’s Keeper, there’s Cry the Name (video, lyrics), where we are reminded of the Lord’s coming like a thief in the night:
I cannot hide this longing that grows
In this temple of silence and stars
But a thief in the night stole in and broke
Every chain that had bound up my heart
I cannot cling to shadows again
So here on this altar tonight
I lay every dream I’ve ever dreamt
To burn in the fire He lights
But don’t take my word for it. Listen to the music and read the lyrics.If you want to buy some albums to get started, I recommend his first greatest hits album and his last few studio albums, namely:
Songs – his greatest hits (note that I don’t strongly recommend Songs 2, a second greatest hits album)
A Liturgy, a Legacy, & a Ragamuffin Band (1993) – beautiful album from start to finish with the exceptions of Hard and How to Grow Up.
Brother’s Keeper (1995) – his last studio album, includes the popular Let Mercy Lead and the aforementioned Cry the Name
Canticle of the Plains (1997) – a musical based on the life of St. Francis of Assisi and set in the Old West (note that Rich wrote the music for this album but did not sing on any of the tracks)
Those of you unfamiliar with Rich may be curious about his theology. Rich was raised a Quaker. His theology as an adult was Evangelical, though more and more Catholic during the later years of his life. For a time, Rich lived on a Navajo reservation and frequently attended daily Mass. He also attended RCIA classes and seriously considered being received into the Church. While Rich never formally converted, rest assured that his songs are definitely influenced by the deposit of faith.
And for those of you who think praise songs like Awesome God are cheesy, you have to admit that they’re pretty cute coming from a 3 year old:
Last night, as I was looking at my household chore chart, I realized that it has been over a month since I have washed the children’s sheets. “Yuck,” I thought. And then I realized that this means that the children have not had an accident or a leaky diaper in over a month, and I thought, “Great!” Looking on the bright side at its best
My sister’s 1st-grade teacher taught her a song called “Stay on the Sunny Side,” and I can still remember her singing (over and over again) “stay on the sunny side, always on the sunny side, stay on the sunny side of life.” A good skill to have as a mother – stay on the sunny side of life.
How are you looking at the bright side this Monday morning? God bless!
First, thank you all for your prayers on behalf of my family, and especially on behalf of my 3 year old son Gus. Gus was very sick for most of May. He was in and out of the hospital during that time, and doctors ran a number of test to determine the cause of his illness. He was diagnosed with a rare GI disease, but there is still some uncertainty as to the exact cause of his recent flare-up, or the possibility of an additional underlying illness. Overall though, Gus has made a remarkable recovery. After losing 6 pounds and almost 20% of his body weight, he has gained most of the weight back (4 of the 6 pounds as of his latest appointment), he is eating better than ever before, and generally doing very well. We are sincerely grateful for all who prayed for Gus and our family.
To add to the craziness of May, we discovered that we are expecting another baby, due in January. Overwhelmed best sums up our feelings, but now that the weeks are passing and Gus is doing so much better, we are feeling very blessed with this new life and excited about our growing family. It helps that I am not nearly as sick as I was with my last pregnancy!
As many of you are aware, we lost our first baby at full term to a severe and fatal neural tube defect called anencephaly. On Thursday of this week, we have an ultrasound to rule out anencephaly. And so I am again asking for prayers. The days and weeks leading up to this ultrasound are never pleasant for me. I am anxiety prone, sleepless, and emotional. With each early pregnancy, it seems I relive our experience 9 years ago with Therese. Five children later, it doesn’t seem to get any easier. But I know your prayers are powerful, and so I humbly ask for them.
Thank you for visiting the new home of Building Cathedrals. We are still working on updates to this site, so the tabs and categories will be corrected over the next few months, in between summer barbecues and diaper changes. We hope you will find the new site much easier to read and will visit us often! St. Joseph, patron of workers, pray for us!
January 31, 2012
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Posted by Kat
– and our entire family has been enjoying watching the progression that the ants have made through the gel over the past few weeks. When we first received this gift in the mail, I have to say that I was slightly terrified by the thought of 30 harvester ants somehow escaping and crawling all over my son’s room. Thankfully, I soon realized that there is no way for the ants to escape, and a gift that I would probably not have bought my son has quickly become a family favorite.
Categories: Miscellaneous
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